Nightly Debrief
Dana and I have a commitment to always go to bed together no matter how tired (or not) the other is. But, we can always expect to not actually get to sleep until 30-minutes to one hour after we climb in bed. The reason is that we have a nightly debrief where we recount the day to each other. We tell the other what we did that day, where we went, who we saw, etc., and more importantly what we felt about all those things. Most of the activities we already know about for each other since we are literally together 24/7. But it is the valuable emotions and thoughts about things that help keep us close.
I hate to open up. Absolutely detest it. I’d just rather be about my own business. Not good when you’re as one with an emotional being. (For the single lads out there, that would be woman just in case you didn’t pick that up.) Over time, I have found that not only do I start pouring out thoughts and feelings once I begin telling Dana about my day but there have actually been nights here recently when I sought to tell her and hear her response to my feelings and enjoyed the fact that time was definitely going to be there. Guys – call me a wuss and I’ve got a big back yard where we can discuss that in further detail.
Just wanted to let you all know how important a committed-to, daily, husband-wife debrief time has become to us. If you’re married, try it.
